真正的勇敢不是心怀恐惧（即使害怕还要去做）

彦彤妈妈说你的孩子勇敢吗？你知道什么是勇敢吗？鼓励宝贝忠于自我，哪怕遇到重重阻力，这才是勇敢的真谛！

勇敢不是“即使害怕还要去做”，而是听从内心的小声音

This is What Brave Means

作者：Glennon Melton 译者：考拉妈妈

Glennon Melton，美国知名自媒体人，亲子教育网站Momastery.com的创始人，《纽约时报》畅销回忆录《继续，战士/Carry on，Warrior》的作者。

“说不”和“说是”都可以是勇敢的回答。一个小女孩这次可以对着期待看她打耳洞的众人说不，或者对要求她从悬崖上跳下的呼声说不，下次就可能对干掉一大杯啤酒或者欺负同龄人说不。无论她的回答是“是”还是“不”，都意味着这是一个拒绝随大流的女孩，一个把遵从自己意愿置于取悦众人之上的女孩。我会大声地骄傲地在全世界面前告诉这个女孩她有多勇敢。这样的女孩是智慧的，她会听从自己内心的声音，并有勇气大声讲出来。即便是，尤其是，在旁人不愿意听到的情况下。

As my little brave Tish said to me the other day in the car, "Mom, how come everyone says YOLO to try to get people to do dangerous stuff? How 'bout be SAFE because YOLO???? You Only Live Once, so try not to get yourself dead so soon." (Tao Of Tentative Tish right there, yes ma'am. BRAVE.)

不久前的一天，我勇敢的蒂什在车里跟我说：“妈妈，为什么人们都把‘你只能活一次’这句话挂在嘴边，然后怂恿别人干危险的事情？不是应该做安全的事情吗？既然你只能活一次，那就更不应该去作死了。”（蒂什还真是深谙斟酌之道。勇敢的孩子。）

I'm with you, Courtney. If we are going to tell our kids to be brave, we must also tell them what brave means. Over time I have come to believe that brave does not mean what we think it does. It does not mean "being afraid and doing it anyway." Nope. Brave means listening to the still small voice inside and DOING AS IT SAYS. Regardless of what the rest of the world is saying. Brave implies WISDOM. Brave people are not simply those who JUMP every time. They do not necessarily "do it anyway." Brave people block out all the yelling voices and listen to the deepest voice inside the quietest, stillest place in their heart. If that voice says JUMP, they jump. And if that voice says TURN AROUND -- they turn around, and they hold their head high. Often the one who turns around shows GREAT BRAVERY, because she has been true to herself even in the face of pressure to ignore her still, small voice and perform for the crowd.

• 勇敢不是“即便害怕还要去做”，而是听从内心的小声音。

我明白你，考特尼。如果我们要让孩子们勇敢，就必须告诉他们勇敢的含义。这么久以来，我终于明白，勇敢的含义跟我们惯常以为的不同。勇敢不是“即便害怕还要去做”，而是听从内心的小声音。小声音怎么说，就怎么去做，而不管全世界怎么看。勇敢即智慧。勇敢的人不是那些说跳就跳的人，他们未必会“说做就去做”，勇敢是抵挡住别人的杂音，仔细聆听自己心底最安宁角落的声音。如果那个声音说跳，那他们就会去跳。如果那个声音说回头，他们就会转身，并且在转身的同时仍然昂首挺胸。表现出极大的勇敢的那个人，往往是回头转身的那个人，因为她忠实于自我，即便众人给了她压力要她去忽略自己心底的小声音。

Brave is VERY SPECIFIC and EXTREMELY personal. It can't be judged by people on the outside. Just can't. Sometimes brave means letting everyone else think you're a coward. Sometimes brave is letting everyone else down but yourself. Amma's brave is often: loud and GO FOR IT and Tish's brave is often: quiet and wait for it. They are both BRAVE GIRLS. Because each is true to herself.

• 勇敢是具体的，并且因人而异。

它不能以外人的眼光来评断，不能就是不能。有时候，勇敢意味着所有人都以为你懦弱。有时候，勇敢意味着让除了你自己以外的所有人失望。艾玛的勇敢很常见：高调且果断；蒂什的勇敢也很常见：安静而斟酌。她俩都是勇敢的姑娘。因为她们忠实于自我。

Brave people only answer to ONE voice and that is the voice that arises within. Brave people are just people who trust themselves more than they trust the crowd.

勇敢的人只听从一个声音，那个由内而发的声音。勇敢的人是那些相信自己胜过相信旁人的人。

Brave is: To Thine Own Self Be True. And Brave parents say: I trust you, little one -- to Be Still and Know. I'll back you up.

• 勇敢就是对自己忠实。

勇敢的家长会说，我信你，孩子。静下心来想清楚。我支持你的决定。

（注：原文的版权都属于原作者）